Monday, April 23, 2007

Waiting is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off

Hello Internet family. I'm extremely frustrated because the people at US Airways seem to be some of the most stupid people on the face of the earth (this includes the extremely rude woman that claimed to be a supervisor that hung up on). I'm sitting on hold waiting to talk to another Supervisor, or Manager, or someone that can help me and I'm bored so I've decided to write a blog. I must warn you though I've got nothing to write a blog about so who knows where this is going to go.

I know let's talk about how NBC has cancelled The Black Donnellys, how October Road is over for the season this Thursday, and how Entourage is always always way too short.

1. Am I the only person that's super sad/pissed that NBC cancelled The Black Donnellys? That show was so good, and the brother that was the lead guy was so hot. It's like they didn't even give the show a chance. What it was on for like 4 episodes and then it was gone. That's what I looked forward to on Monday nights. I saw let's start a letter writing campaign and get Black Ds back.

2. Why is October Road over for the season this Thursday? Seriously there have been like 6 episodes and now it's going to be over for the season this Thursday. Why that's just crazy. I mean Bryan Greenberg aka Nick Garrett is so freaking hot it's ridic, and who isn't happy that Donna is doing so well? ABC needs more October Road and less Desperate Housewives (I'm so over that show.)

3. WHY IS ENTOURAGE ALWAYS SO SHORT? Hello I love this show I wait all week for 10:00pm Sunday and the actual show last night was literally 20minutes long. What's next, 15minute sitcoms? Say it with me "We Want Longer Entourage Episodes. We Want Longer Entourage Episodes." Like we all couldn't use a little more Vinny Chase doing the hot/whiny thing that he does, Drama reliving the good ole days, Turtle to turn Ashley on, E I don't know what E does but he does it well, Ari with his fab one liners damn I love him. I do pose one question to everyone out there; what is the take on more Lloyd? I like Lloyd, I love love Lloyd, but it does kind of gay the show up don't you think? More so then the Ari/Vince/ love non-triangle triangle does. Now please PLEASE don't get me wrong I love LOVE the gays, but I think it's too much I think Lloyd's character was made more of an impact when it was in small doses, but that's just my opinion.

That's it for now.

Oh FYI the women that claimed to be a supervisor wasn't and I spoke to a real supervisor and she couldn't have been nicer and more together.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Celebrity Gossip I am your bitch lover and I miss you so

Dear Celebrity Gossip,
I am sorry that I have been away for so long I gave you up for a good reason and now that I have you back I have no time for you. You make my life better with your bitchy comments, dirty sex scandals, nip slips, and pee pee shots real or fake. I know we started out so strong and I was so dedicated for so long, I am sure you must ask yourself "what have I done wrong?" Well celebrity gossip you haven't done anything wrong. It is me I am the one that has done something wrong. I have let work get in the way of what it is important, you and all your gorgessity mean the world to me and yet I treat you like you don't matter. Laineygossip.com, thesuperficial.com, pinkisthenewblog.com, and popsugar.com to name a few of you my days would be bleak with out you.

Thank you for always being there for me for always providing me with "reliable" information no matter what else in the world may be going on. When I was strained in many an airport for no real reason you were there to entertain me, when I didn't feel like working because work was making me want to gouge my eyes out you were there, and when I was lonely on a Tuesday night you were there.

My resolution from here on out is to stop being so selfish and to start putting you before my work. I promise to always know who is pickling who, who is rumored to be gay or had a lesbian love affair, who is entering/leaving rehab, who is refusing to have their picture taken because they just want to lead a normal life, and to always always know what new diseases have infected Paris Hilton and Lyndsey Lohan and what crazy anticts Brit Brit is up to these days.

Thank you celebrity gossip without you I would be lost.

Sarah

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

What is wrong with the world we live in

I cant stop thinking about what happened at Virginia Tech. No matter what I do my mind drifts back to the students, the facility, the families everyone whose lives have been forever changed by the acts of one selfish person. I cant imagine waking up and going to class one Monday morning and being greeted by a crazed gunman. The mass hysteria that took the place of the once quiet campus has now been replaced by a somber silence. I cant help but feel like on some level it's wrong to go on with my day as if nothing has happened as if 33 people were not murdered yesterday and for what? Because some twisted sick person decided to take his revenge against the "rich kids, debauchery, and deceitful charlatans". I do not know anyone at Virginia Tech, but I do have friends that know people that are in school there, have friends there, or siblings there and I can not image what they must be going through. I cant imagine being a parent of a student at Virginia Tech or the spouse of a facutly to member at Virginia Tech the unknowing would must be unbareble. Officials have yet to release all of the names of those murdered yesterday, and my heart goes out to every family and every friend that is just sitting there waiting to find out what has become of their loved ones.

"Why did this happen and what could have been done to prevent it from happening" will inevitably be the next questions asked, and ones that should be asked, but both are questions that can not be answered easily. According to cnn.com Cho Seung-Hui was an English Major and had an ascendancy to write plays so disturbing they had to be turned into the Head of the English Department, but what could they really have done? In college you are supposed to be able to express yourself and grow freely, but where do you draw the line between expressing your self and recognizing a call for help. I'm not going to get into the whole gun control issue argument or the freedom of speech argument (I think we've all had enough of that argument lately) right now because that's not the point of this blog. The point is to remember those that died yesterday and ask everyone to pray for those that were lost pray for their families and their friends, pray for the students and the facility and staff at Virginia Tech. Things will never be the same there again.

Monday, April 16, 2007

I put the "itch" in what?

I am 23 years old and for someone that is 23 I’d like to think I know myself fairly well. I’m still changing quite a bit and I discover new things about myself everyday and am continuously trying to evolve into someone better, but despite all of this the one thing that has never changed and I don’t see changing is the fact that I’m a bitch. This is a label I wear proudly I don’t think of it as a bad thing I embrace it and love it. The only problem with being a bitch is that people tend to think that if you are a bitch you must be a horrible person, and that’s simply not true.

Yes, I have high expectations I have them for myself and I have them for others. When I order an appetizer I don’t expect it to come out with my entrée and when it does you can beat your last dollar I will ask for the entrée to be taken back and if need be remade. No, it’s not ok that I asked for a bed with NO feathers because Im allergic to them and I have now had to call house keeping three times to ask for foam pillows and this is not including the request that was made when I made my hotel reservation and the double checking that took place when I checked in to verify that I indeed was given foam pillows, because I’m sorry I’m not sorry I don’t like waking up in the middle of the night stuffy and having a hard time breathing, and I still have feather pillows, and it’s also not ok with me that I’ve just stood at the sandwich counter at Publix for 5 minutes while the guy tinkers with the chicken cooker and cant even be bothered to say to me “I/someone will be right with you”, because last I checked you were getting paid to work the deli counter at Publix and I’m pretty certain that making me a sandwich is part of working the deli counter at Publix

Now pay attention because here is where the difference between being a bitch and a good person and a bitch and not a good person comes in. Yes, I have high expectations and tend to not accept anything less, but at the same time I am honest I try not to lie, I don’t steal, I don’t cheat, I don’t litter, I don’t fight, I donate money when I have it to charity, I like to volunteer when I’m home, I’m dedicated, I’m a hard worker. I’m a good person, but I think that sometimes gets lost because I’m not exactly the laid back type. I’m not going to just sit there and look pretty, if I disagree with you you will know it, if you’ve pissed me off you will know it, if I got shitty service you will know it. When someone f’s up I’m learning to decipher between whether they did it because they simply don’t care and/or are trying to piss me off or if they really do care and really didn’t mean to f up in which case I am trying to be more accepting. Why because I’m a good person.

Now a bitch that is a bitch and isn’t a good person obviously has a lot in common with me, but lacks the basic understanding that all people deserve to be treated with a minimal amount of respect for no other reason then they are human beings. The basic difference I think is the way not good people go about interacting with everyone else in the world. The basic I’m better than you the world owes me for gracing them with my presence approach to life. I cant stand that shit. Didn’t anyone teach you that you catch more flies with honey, do unto others as you would have them do unto you, dont be a raging bitch all the damn time. It’s really not that hard of a concept to master, and don’t be surprise when no one wants to be around you because you are a horrible person, but I digress.

The point of this blog is that you can be opinionated and you can have high standards and be successful without being unnecessarily mean to everyone that crosses your path or make everyone around you feel like the size of an ant and want to kill themselves. I do it everyday. At least I think I do.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

My must does

Ok so it's 4:19am and I cant sleep and instead of getting some work done to be ahead of things when I get to work I've decided to write a blog (yes, thank you I bring work home I'm a workohlic). This is a list of things I would like to do before I leave Charleston. Some of them are things I have never done before, some are things I have done but not in ages, and some are just general must do one last timers. So here it goes. P.S. (too early for a P.S. oh well) I dont have my glasses on and dont feel like looking for them so oh well if my typing is um less than perfect.

1. Pick fruit on Johns Island strawberries, peaches, watermelons, bananas, mangoes whatever I don't care I just want to pick some damn fruit.
2. Go on a tour of Ft. Moultrie and Ft. Sumter I did it a bunch when i was in school, but you know I was all too cool to actually pay attention to the park ranger leading the tour and appreciate the history that these places had to offer.
3. Picnic at the Battery it doesn't have to be romantic it can be a bunch of friends I don't care, but i want to bring a blanket and food and drinks (not alcohol because i might get arrested and i don't have money for bail). This one is timely because once it hits mid-May it's way way too hot to do something like this
4. Spend the day with my brother/mother/father. I mean i see them all the time and we are really close, but I feel like we never actually do anything together aside from going the 2 hour car trips to Columbia to see my Aunt in which i inevitably want to kill myself. So i want to spend time with them each alone just doing whatever
5. Make out on the beach at night. It's literally been ages and ages since I've done this and come on whats better than making out with a hot guy under the stars with the ocean at your feet? Nothing that's what
6. Go on a carriage ride. This one i could do without, because I don't think i could sit by all the tourists, but its on the list
7. Go four wheeling . . . hello fun
8. Go off shore fishing Ive never been id like to go I think it would be awesome
9. Go horseback riding i love horseback riding and I don't know that there are a lot of places to go horseback riding in NYC
10. Go to brunch at High Cotton. This is a simple thing, but something i can never manage to get myself up for and apparently the brunch here is amazing, it is apparently rather expensive that's ok its my last summer here right
11. Get a tattoo that reads "Southern Girl For Life" on my left ankle.


JUST KIDDING
12. Go out on a sailboat

13. Go to a few more concerts at the Music Farm and the Wind Jammer
14. Learn how to run a boat. This will more than likely not happen unless I meet someone with a boat that has a lot of patience and is willing to teach me
15. Trip to the great island of Cappers
16. Take pictures from the top of the Ravenel Bridge and maybe run it, but that's a big maybe
17. Have a huge going away party

Ok that's it for now I know there must be more, but I'm tired and can't think of anything else. Look for another post later today something not about Charleston i think I feel like reliving life as a band dork and why i loved it so much. Who's excited?

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

My fantasy mailbag

Ok if Josh whatever his last name is should be happy that I remember his first name, can have a mailbag then I can have a fantasy mailbag. I love fantasy worlds I constantly live in like 7 fantasy worlds so this is my fantasy mailbag. In this world my blog is so popular that I get so many questions it takes me weeks to read them so here is a small sample of some of the questions I have received thus far.

Q. Why am I so wonderful?
A. Because I am, I dont have a real answer or real reason I just am. Sometimes I think wow is it really possible for someone to be this weird oh wait oh the word was wonderful yes thats what I meant wonderful, I'm wonderful not weird no I'm not weird at all. Next question

Q. Will you have my babies?
A. Um, no I appreciate you thinking of me, but I dont think I can do that. I have a strict no babies for strangers policy and I'm sorry but you are a stranger. Again thank you for asking though.

Q. What will you be doing this weekend?
A. I will be in NYC with Ashley. Ok that question wasnt very interesting I just wanted to tell everyone that I will be in NYC this weekend. It's Ashley's first trip. Who's excited? I am

Q. What is the real Sarah Pittman like?
A. Complete and total opposite of what you read in my blog. I'm shy, not funny, dont like to drink, hate curse words. This is all a facade. Thanks for asking, and thanks for bringing up the fact that I'm actually painfully shy.

Q. Will you marry me?
A. How much money do you make?

Q. You seem like so much fun do you need a partner in crime I would be honored to hang out with someone as assume as you?
A. Thanks I like to think of myself as fun at least I always have fun when I'm with myself, but I actually already have a partner in crime, Ashley. We do however recruite when we meet someone worthy of the Sarah/Ashley assumeness, but I cant promise anything.

Ok folks that's it for now keep the questions coming and I'll do another mailbag.

Monday, April 2, 2007

i'm so sorry

Heeeeeellllllooooooooo blogging community. I've just realized that when I started this blog I promised to regale you with stories of my drunken experiences complete with enough curse words to make a sailor blush, and I have fallen down on my promise to my avid readers, and for this I'm sorry. In order to right this wrong I'm going to the vault and I'm pulling out a Sarah Pittman original. A story that embodies all that I am.


One night about a year - year and a half ago (I always think events are a year - year and a half in the past) a bunch of us decided to go to Torch a local Martinee ("Is that a Martinee?" Sweet Home Alabama anyone no just me ok back to my story) bar, where the drinks are awesome way over priced but awesome and strong as all get out. Well we are hanging out doing are thing you know whatever whatever. And by the end of the night I've had any where from 5-12 drinks. So 2am aka closing time roles around and everyone says their goodbyes and Ashley and I make our way to her car, and oh wait oh no what is this feeling that has come over me ah yes I have to pee. Of course I didn't have to pee 2 minutes ago, but I have to go now and there is no waiting. So I cop a squat on the side of the road to the side of Ashley's car, because when you are squatting beside a car you become invisible. I bet you didn't know that, but it's true so remind that kiddies. Any who so I'm squatting peeing and Ashley's laughing working look out and she feels it most important to warn me that I'm about to pee on myself, now I ask you who wouldn't find that to be the funniest statement ever? Well I did and I lost my balance and fell forward peeing all over my jeans. Obviously I couldn't ride home in my pee pants so the only logical thing to do was take them off and ride home in the front seat of Ashley's car butt-ass-naked from the waist down. Classy is typcially how I refer to myself, thank you.

Now I know what you are thinking, oh Sarah you are so silly that story is so good how could it get any better? Well it does. So we get back to Ashley's and she gives me a change of clothes because no one wants a naked Sarah running around. So I change and boy did I work up an appetite changing my clothes. So I precede to raid her refrigerator and when she comes out she finds me sitting Indian style in front of the refrigerator the room only illuminated by the light from the fridge, because I was being sneaky. I'm stuffing my face with turkey just stuffing it. I've got turkey all over my face all over my shirt all over my new clean pants, and she basically has to drag me away from the fridge and from the turkey that is her roommates, her mean roommates, and then I passed out. See I told you it got better.

I will leave you with that, I know everyone has an extremely elevated opinion of me after reading that truly wonderful story please do leave comments. I was recently informed that you are a "loser" if you don't have more than 8 comments per blog and I don't know if anyone has noticed, but my average is like 1 1/2 so send this on to everyone you know and maybe they will leave me comments and I can stop being "socially inept"